Fake it!
Author: Ella Huang

Faking can be very beneficial to us. As a matter of fact, life requires us to have a ‘faking attitude’ to get through. If we never fake on anything, perhaps we won’t be as happy and successful as we can be.

Think about this. If you don’t fake it to be motivated and enthusiastic on Monday morning, you might sleep in and not turn up at work. Pretending that you love your job when you feel slack at times may do a little trick and get you kick start.

Actors are great fakers. It is their job to fake. It is said that all actors have traits of double personalities. Even they don’t have it by nature, they must learn to develop such a trait to be good at acting. Those who can fake the best become the most successful actors.

Not just actors fake. We are all capable of faking. Think for a moment: have you never posed in front a camera? Have you never squeezed an artificial smile towards a colleague or a customer? Faking smiles, in particular, is a great art and skill and has a lot of benefits. It has been said that the pulling of muscle when your smile automatically creates a sense of ease and relaxation even when you are not in a happy mood. As a matter of fact, learning to laugh is one of the healing method used in many therapies. Just by laughing out loud, the lungs can pump extra air in the body and make us feel better instantly.

If you are down and feel depressed and one of your friends ask you to go out to a party. You are reluctant to go at the beginning but eventually can’t resist your friend’s persuasion so you get out of your comfort zone. What would you rather choose? Would you stay put and show no interest in others so that you don’t enjoy them and they don’t enjoy you, or would you loosen up yourself and chat away with people, pretending that you enjoy their company? Chances are, if you choose the latter approach, you may well enjoy the party in the end because you have made the effort to participate and to get involved.

By no means I encourage people not to be genuine, honest and kind. On the contrary, Faking in many occasions is perhaps one of the conducts of being genuine, honest and kind. Thanking people, for example, for what they have done to us, even they might have got it wrong or done it in a less than perfect way, is a reflection of our genuineness and kindness. Have you ever been invited to a friend’s place for dinner, and despite the great effort they put, the meal turns out to be a disaster? Would you not thank them, if you are a genuine person?

Faking orgasm, is another very mysterious subject. No man can understand why a woman would fake orgasm. They would ask: why bother if you don’t want it? Perhaps no woman can understand why they fake either but it just happens. Because it‘s women’s nature to be kind, to care, to want to please, and to want to boost their men’s ego.

Faking orgasm is not all that bad, as men commonly think. Isn’t faking orgasm just like faking to be in good mood on Monday morning for work, faking to have a smile in front of a camera, or faking to be happy in a party when you are low? Isn’t it part of being flexible, positive and adapting? Isn’t it part of showing respect to a lover? If a woman can fake an orgasm, at least it shows she doesn’t mind intimacy with her partner. Isn’t it better than totally shutting down and impose sex punishment to their partners as some women do?

There are times when I eat when I am not hungry. There are times when I feel lazy for exercises but I do it any way as I know once I get up running, I can’t stop. Likewise, there are times (and it’s bound to happen!) when one partner feels like love making while the other doesn’t. By going along, we create a harmonious balance and avoid vicious cycle of one partner always having to second guess if his or her partner will be in the mood thus creating unnecessary anxiety. Besides, faking is only a start, who knows what may happen in the process and in the end? Chances are, you may end up enjoying it. If it doesn‘t happen, the kindness and love in giving remains. Isn‘t the action of giving that makes a relationship blossom? Like all the faking I mentioned above, faking orgasm is just another win-win situation.

Let’s fake it.







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Ella Huang is a freelance writer. She shares her insights about love, passion, dreams and spirituality in: http://passioncity.blogspot.com and http://thedreamweaver.blogspot.com

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