Your sacred space
Author: Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D.

Many of us have a place in our lives where we feel especially free and creative. They are places we retreat when we want to recover from a bad day, celebrate a good day, think through a knotty problem, or write the first draft of our next chapter.

Some people head for the hills and the parks, but sacredness can come anywhere: one friend confided that she wrote her best grad school papers in a pizza parlor. Sometimes your entire home, and sometimes a special room in your home, will be a sacred space.

There are two things to remember. First, you will feel at home in a new city or a new life after you have found a sacred space. Second, you cannot go searching for a sacred space. Your sacred space will find you.

I have enjoyed several sacred spaces as I've moved around the country. Often my sacred space is a coffee shop. Years ago, visiting at a university in New England, I was stuck on a research paper. One weekend I drove down to New Haven, where I found a coffee shop with just the right vibes. An outline drafted itself in half an hour.

In Philadelphia, I particularly liked the Tuscany coffee shop, just around the corner from my apartment. The counter staff got to know me. At first I had to convince them that I really prefer raw, untoasted bagels and yes, I know it's January, but I still want my coffee iced. I first began to feel at home when they handed me one of their Christmas cards for "regulars" with a coupon for a free cappuccino.

I didn't find a sacred space in Florida until Keesha, my keeshond-chow mix, entered my life. As a new dog owner, I soon learned a profound truth: "A tired good is a good dog." Keesha and I learned to love the dog park in Coral Springs, just north of Fort Lauderdale. I knew she had enough exercise when she was too tired to bark at the toll-takers on the Sawgrass Expressway. When she gave up chasing the cats after a half-hearted "arf," I knew we were on to something.

The dog park became a sacred space. I would walk while Keesha ran, appreciating the cool breezes and the open space. When my career change became frustrating, I would walk through the park and visualize a new future.

I must say I am not a great fan of Gainesville, Florida, where I just spent a year as a visiting professor. (Forgive me, Gator fans,) But Keesha and I both found a home in the dog park. If you're not a student, Gainesville can be lonely, and the dog park had people to talk to during the week and a place to hide from people on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

In my own Fort Lauderdale house, my backyard offers a private place to sit with the dog, drink my iced coffee, and watch the birds. Fort Lauderdale is a hub for migratory species and cardinals, orioles and bluebirds stop by as the seasons change.

So...what's your sacred space? Has your space changed over the last few years? Did you find a sacred space when you moved your residence, job or relationship? Answering these questions will tell you a lot about yourself and your world.








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Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and success coach who helps people move to freedom in their lives and careers. For her free ezine, send a blank email to subscribe@movinglady.com. Her website is www.movinglady.com.

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Sweeping Up Worms
Author: Nan S. Russell

With the opening of a new venture and numerous reporters arriving in an hour, it felt like one of those "chickens with heads off" days. We were close, but not ready. So like locusts to a wheat field, a swarm of people were devouring the last minute details. Then, it rained. With rain, came worms, hundreds washing onto the entrance sidewalk. When I returned to the area, I found a manager, several department supervisors and a director outside with brooms, sweeping up worms. No one asked them to sweep worms. But, with guests arriving shortly and no one else available, they found brooms and started sweeping.

They didn't get hung up over titles or roles. Instead, they did what needed to be done at the time. Their actions were what I call, ego-detached. Being ego-detached frees you to do what needs to be done because it's not about you; it's about something bigger than you. It's an attitude of contribution. How can I best serve today? How can I help? What can I contribute? Being ego-detached is taking the you (your ego) out of the picture. It's looking at the best result, not necessarily the result that's best for you.

But here's the twist. Being ego detached is not being ego-less. I heard Donald Trump talking about egos with Larry King on CNN recently. He commented that all the successful people he knew had big egos, defining ego as confidence or self-esteem. Certainly believing in yourself and having high self-esteem are qualities to help grow personal success. I'm not suggesting you shed either. Quite the opposite. You need plenty of confidence and self-esteem in order to be ego-detached.

I learned that lesson as a senior manager involved in a start-up company. One afternoon, the president saw me stapling information sheets in a conference room. After saying good-bye to his guest he came back and asked, "Nan, what are you doing?" After explaining why meeting a FedEx pickup was critical to an important corporate initiative and the number of people working to meet it, he offered to help. People who are ego-detached recognize that the best use of their time and talent can vary in the moment.

I used to marvel at colleagues of mine, other Vice Presidents, who delayed getting something to their boss because their executive assistant was gone for the day and it needed copying. I'm not talking about the stuff that can and should wait. It's those late night meetings when the boss says he'd like to review something that night and he needs a copy. Ego-detached people go to the copier, copy it and walk the copy back to their boss, regardless of title. It's how best they can serve at the moment.

If you want to be winning at working, don't let your ego dictate your actions, let the situation. Don't be afraid to sweep up worms from time to time. And don't be afraid to serve. As Tolstoy put it, "The vocation of every man and woman is to serve other people." That's ego-detached.

(c) 2004 Nan S. Russell. All rights reserved.







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Sign up to receive Nan's free biweekly eColumn at www.winningatworking.com. Nan Russell has spent over twenty years in management, most recently with QVC as a Vice President. She has held leadership positions in Human Resource Development, Communication, Marketing and line Management. Nan has a B.A. from Stanford University and M.A. from the University of Michigan. Currently working on her first book, Winning at Working: 10 Lessons Shared, Nan is a writer, columnist, small business owner, and on-line instructor. Visit www.nanrussell.com or contact Nan at info@nanrussell.com.

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